"I had visions, I was in them.
I was looking into the mirror,
To see a little bit clearer,
The rottenness and evil in me.
Fingertips have memories,
Mine can't forget the curves of your body.
And when I feel a bit naughty,
I run it up the flagpole and see who salutes,
(But no one ever does).
I'm not sick, but I'm not well,
and I'm so hot 'cause I'm in hell."
- Flagpole Sitta; Harvey Danger.
Xiao-cheng grew up in a household of oppression. Strict curfews, strict opinions, strict father. His mother had died when he was very young, and his father was incredibly conservative. He was one of the many who opposed Oki's union to Waka. And he made his opinions known to his sons.
But unfortunately for the father, his sons both... dabbled in things he wished never to see. Both Xiao and his brother were undeniably, unchangeably gay. It was no choice for them. But their father attempted to beat it out of them, scolding them with fist and word about habits he deemed filthy and disgusting.
Xiao's younger brother was physically weak. He endured beatings for many years, but after one late night with a boy he fancied, their father went into a fit of rage. To prevent the boy from escaping into loving arms, he cut off the boy's foot. This act drove Xiao's brother into a depression so deep that he took his own life. This act solidified Xiao-chen's hatred of his own sexuality. After all, it had cost him his brother. And so he attempted to force himself to enjoy women. But always his eyes would fall on a good-looking boy instead. He chastised himself, refused to accept it. But he always seemed to end up in situations where he and another boy were.. close. And he would react with violence to the advances, repeating his father's words as he struck.
His soul has been so twisted by his father's ideals, is it possible to set him free from the prison his mind has created?
---
Someone was certainly intent on trying.
Hikaru and Xiao met through rather unhappy means, getting into a fight near the lake. Oki punished Xiao by forcing him to stay at Hikaru's home. And it didn't take long for Hikaru to get Xiao into bed (though he wasn't entirely able to stop this). Still Xiao protested.
Hikaru asked who had hurt Xiao, to make him act like this. And at the time, Xiao didn't answer. He continued to fight with his own urges, so much harder with Hikaru around to tempt him. It didn't take long for the stubborn man to snap, and he attempted to kill Hikaru, stabbing him. Thanks to quick work from Kiyoko, Hikaru lived.
But Xiao still despised him. Convinced that Hikaru had only gotten him in bed through trickery. This assessment wasn't far off. Hikaru was a skilled manipulator. He had even managed to get Oki into his bed, by taking advantage of the warrior's loss when Waka had been kidnapped. Xiao had seen this, and many other tricks that the man had pulled.
He was constantly forced into interaction with the man, and while in the Lunar Realm to rescue Waka, he followed Hikaru when the Lunaris man had slipped off. There, he inadvertently put himself in a position where he would kill the woman who had betrayed Hikaru long ago. Save him from her.
After this, Hikaru's attitude towards Xiao changed, became somewhat more sincere, and it left Xiao terribly confused. Drinking just enough to ease his fears, he once more joined Hikaru in bed. But this time, of his own choice.
It was then that he revealed his past to Hikaru, and he found comfort with the man.
---
His fears about his own ways were eased over time, and he became comfortable with himself, and with Hikaru, living with the man upon their return to Wep'keer. But his mind, now having nothing to fight, chose a new battle. It refused to allow Xiao to love the Lunaris man, the man who had tricked and used him. It didn't matter that Xiao had already fallen for him.
He began to run away from Hikaru, sleeping with other men after asking Hikaru to be loyal. Trying to distance himself from the man.
For a time, Hikaru put up with this, saddened until he learned why the man was doing it. But, after so long, he grew tired, and employed a different tactic, chaining Xiao up in their home, refusing to let him go until he admitted, or realized, what was going on.
It took months, Xiao grew weak and desperate and withdrew entirely. But Hikaru was persistant, and eventually, Xiao understood what he was doing. And after much thought (and hearing Kiyoko's opinion), he decided to risk it.
He would trust his heart to the trickster who tamed him.
Above picture was drawn by Raven